Every new year, people make new year’s resolutions, but according to a study in the Journal of Clinical Psychology, after six months, over half had given up. As a licensed counselor who specializes in mental and emotional health, Debra Fileta knows that to achieve effective, long-lasting change, you have to know and understand what is happening on the inside. You have to understand your thoughts and feelings before you can make meaningful changes in your actions and live an emotionally healthy life.

In her new book, Reset: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life (Harvest House Publishers, March 14, 2023), Fileta walks readers through 31 powerful and sustainable practices that will reset the way things have been done in the past in order to dive underneath the surface and bring insight to their thoughts and feelings, ultimately changing their life.

“These are all the tools I teach my patients as a counselor,” says Fileta. “Throughout the pages of this book, we’re going to go on a life-changing journey. And I mean that literally. We’re going to get comfortable with going under the surface – owning our thoughts, understanding our feelings, and changing our behaviors. We’re going to stop doing things the way we’ve done them in the past and try something new.

Each of the 31 chapters focuses on a specific tool or practice rooted in God’s word with activities and exercises to hold the reader accountable and help them apply it to their own lives. The practices include taking a pause before you start, expecting something new, dealing with emotions, preparing for change, facing the hard in your life and healing childhood wounds.

“It’s not a once-and-done thing, and neither is healing, growth, and change,” writes Fileta. “The process of becoming healthy is something you have to work at—something you have to practice. You don’t usually get it right the first time, but it’s in the practice that you see things begin to shift.” 

Fileta is available for interviews and can speak to:

• Pause and Listen – How to tune out what is going on around us to listen to what is going on inside of us

• Own your Junk – How to acknowledge your unhealthy habits-more-

• Negative Thinking – Where it comes from and how to replace it.

• Emotions are a signal – Learning to tune into our emotions

• It’s Not a One Player Game – Why we don’t ask for help but why we need it.

• Childhood Wounds – How we can get stuck in our past trauma if we don’t deal with it. 

• Time doesn’t heal all wounds – How to face our emotional wounds and why it is important

• The freedom of feelings – Why it is important to give yourself permission to feel.

• Triggers are Everywhere – How to handle triggers and what they mean for healing.

• Soul Care – The importance of caring for yourself so you can effectively care for others.

• Healing Happens in Layers – Why bad habits or struggles resurfacing is an opportunity for deeper healing.

Debra Fileta

Debra is a Licensed Professional Counselor and national speaker specializing in relationship and marital issues as well as mental and emotional health. She is the author of six books and host of the Love + Relationships Podcast where she is passionate about spreading the message that healthy people make healthy relationships. She is the creator of the popular relationship advice blog TrueLoveDates.com, reaching millions of readers with her candid yet compassionate style, which combines psychology and faith. She’s also the founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network helping people heal from the inside out.

Fileta is a prolific writer, with well over 500+ articles and interviews about love, marriage, dating, sex, and relationships across the internet. She has been featured in magazines and TV outlets such as Today's Christian Woman, Better Together, Focus on the Family, 700 Club, Proverbs 31, IAmSecond, Converge Magazine, Relevant Magazine, Crosswalk.com, Charisma Magazine, Christianity Today, and many others. Connect with her on Facebook or Instagram @DebraFileta.