Lessons I Learned from My Mother- By Cassandra Portee

BEING A MOTHER IS THE TOP MOST IMPORTANT JOB IN THE WORLD. You attend school to learn your ABCs, learn math, and learn how to read. But, there is not textbook or manual that can teach you how to be a mother.  You learn valuable life lessons from your mother who is your FIRST TEACHER. 

Over the years I have reflected on the many lessons I learned from my mother, and applied her teachings to help me get through the challenges I faced.  Today I am still using those lessons I learned from her years ago.

 I would like to share seven lessons I learned from my mother:

1.    ATTEND CHURCH:  Attending church was an important part of my family life.  There is not a time in my life that I do not remember not going to church.  The rule was as long as you lived under my mother’s roof, you went to church.   My mom used to say if God gave you strength to go to work and school, and go other places for six days of the week, then least you can do is go to church to give HIM some of your time because He gives us all of HIS time.

2.    RESPECT AUTHORITY:  I was taught to respect those who are older than me.  My mother would say to me and my siblings “All you girls owe me is RESPECT.”  To this day I apply that lesson to those who are older than me as well as those who are my age or younger.

3.    SERVE & HELP OTHERS:  Nothing gives me greater joy than to help and serve others.  My mother set this example by doing what she could to help people and she taught my sisters and me to always be kind and help others when we can. Her words: “the day will come when you will need someone to help you,” has never left me.

4.    IMPORTANCE OF EDUCATION:  My mother grew up on a farm with her three sisters and two brothers.  She did not graduate from high school.  With her own children she stressed the importance of education.  Mama often told us we could not do what she did and make it with limited education.  She emphasized education is the key to having a better life.

5.    BE HONEST:  I cannot count the number of times I got in trouble with my mother for not telling her the truth.  She would eventually get the truth out of me, and yes there were serious consequences I had to deal with because I was not honest.  I finally came to my senses and realized being honest and truthful from the start was much better than being punished.  Mama held me accountable for my actions and I thank her for this life lesson.

6.    TOUGH LOVE:  When I wanted to do what my friends were doing, and my mother said I could not, I would whine and beg her to let me go with my friends or do whatever my friends were doing.  She had no problem reminding me she was not concerned what other parents allowed their children to do. She often told me, “Sandra, the Lord has given me a little more wisdom, and I can see further down the road than you can.”  At that time I wished God would give me a little more wisdom and let me see a little further down the road also.  How grateful I am to her for not wavering in her decision.

7.    BE RESPONSIBLE:  My mother often told us she was not going to be with us always.  One day her eyes would close (and they have) and all we would have to fall back on were the lessons she taught us.  At a very young age she taught us to be accountable for our actions and the decisions we made.

I am who I am today by the lessons I learned from my mother.   As a little girl I used to think and ask GOD why did HE give me to Rosa Smith and not to another mother?   I am grateful for HIM sending me to her.  My father died when I was 11 years old, and my mother had structure and discipline in her home.  She did not let it be the excuse because she was a single parent that we could be wild.  No, she had a duty to raise my sisters and me, and she did it well. 

The same lessons I learned from my mother are the same lessons I taught my daughter.  I never would have learned those lessons from a textbook.  Mama was selfless and she sacrificed so much for me and my sisters to provide and give us an education.  She worked hard and set the example that if you want something you have to work for it.

There was something my mother said to me that has remained with me to this day, and I told my daughter the same thing.  She said,”Sandra, children are a blessing and gift from God.  He has already outlined in HIS BOOK how I am to raise you and your sisters.  HE entrusted you into my care.  If I do not do what HE has commanded in HIS BOOK in raising you all, I will have to give an account when I stand before HIM.”

I never forgot those words.  I am truly blessed to have had a Godly mother.